The best place to start is for both people to read information on and process of discernment counseling to decide whether this is of interest to both of them. If you are both ready to start, you can call or contact me to set up an appointment. I have offices in Falmouth, Sandwich and Mattapoisett, MA. Due to couples often being in the midst of a marital crisis, I try to accommodate appointment requests as soon as possible, with appointment times in the afternoons and evenings.
Assessment:
I will conduct a telephone or email screening to assess whether Discernment Counseling is appropriate. At your intake session, we will complete basic paperwork, much less than insurance companies require. I will begin the session by meeting with couples together, then I will meet individually with one person. The other partner is brought in for a summary, and I then meet with the second person. I meet again with the couple to both summarize what the second partner would like to communicate, and for an overall summary of the session. You then decide if you would like another appointment.
Goals of Discernment Counseling are that you have:
- A deeper understanding of what has happened to your marriage and what might be possible for the future
- Clarity about what direction to take for your marriage, and
- Confidence as you move forward
During the discernment process, we will be discussing 3 pathways that make this different from marriage counseling, which are:
- Path 1-Keeping the marriage the way it is. No significant work on the relationship is planned, nor is divorce being actively pursued
- Path 2-Moving toward separation and/or divorce
- Path 3-Agreeing on a 6-month commitment to work on the marriage before making a decision. If divorce was being considered, it is “off the table” during this 6-month process
Discernment Counseling is not a viable option for couples experiencing the following:
- One person has already decided on divorce
- One person in coercing the other to participate in the process
- There is a danger of domestic violence
Session Options:
Initial sessions are either 2 hours or 90 minutes in length. Two options are available to choose from according to your preference.
Option 1
Intake Session 2 hours
Sessions 2-5 90 minutes
Option 2
Intake Session 90 minutes
Sessions 2-5 1 hour
Your decision to choose either option may based on a variety of reasons including scheduling, finances, or personal preference. The recommended protocol is option 1, which allows appropriate time to fully process information brought up during the session. Option 2 will be paced differently to maximize a shorter session. You may change your session length at any time, just as you will be deciding about whether to engage in future sessions at the end of each session.
Hopeful Spouse Counseling:
Sometimes one person wants to work on or save the relationship and the other person is not interested. Hopeful Spouse counseling can help you to bring your best self to the marital crisis to work more cooperatively toward whatever outcome is decided on by your or your spouse. It is short-term and helps you to look at your contributions and to engage more effectively and collaboratively with your partner.
Marriage counseling:
Depending on our mutual schedules and whether all parties feel that the counseling relationship is a good fit, I am available to provide couples/marriage counseling after your Discernment Counseling sessions.
Rates/Payment Information:
Rates are $130 per hour for all counseling services. Debit and credit cards are accepted for payment at time of service. Hardship cases can be discussed for a reduced rate. I will provide you with a receipt to be reimbursed by your private insurance company upon your completion of their paperwork and calling to confirm. Insurance companies are required to reimburse out-of-network mental health providers.
